Finding the Right Path and Staying On It
My very first blog entry. Well, I wouldn’t say my first ever, but my first for this site. My name is Lindsay. Most people call me Lindsay or Linds, depending on how close you are to me. I used to be fat, and that is not an understatement. I was fat. At 5’5” tall 263 pounds (yes, I just shared that with the World Wide Web) was not a good look.
It finally dawned on me how unhappy I was when I saw a picture of my best friend and I on the last day of my 30th birthday weekend/vacation. I could barely make out a smile underneath all that fat!
At that point in time I was very sedentary. I worked part time as an “executive assistant,” yea, fancy title for a secretary…ha ha ha.
I never had time to leave the office, and when I did it was to walk to the pizza place next door, grab a couple slices and eat them at my desk. I was miserable. My hair was falling out, I was gaining weight (duh, I was fat), my love life and self-esteem were in the toilet, and I generally just hated life…
A Simple Change For The Better
It wasn’t until that following November that my life would forever change….dun dun dun…..I was let go from my job. Yes, most people would be sad over this, but I was happy as a clam. I was sick of being put down on a daily basis and being called when I was out of town or on my own time.
My boss wanted me to leave a volunteer appreciation dinner and drive back two hours to help her mail off something that was her responsibility. Too bad my phone had died. After I was let go, it felt like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders! I was happy, I was smiling more and my attitude was moving in the right direction.
Now, a friend of mine had joined a fitness website that allowed you to track your food and exercise and also be social; so I thought “why not, nothing to lose, and the worst would be making no friends.” That had to be the BEST decision I made. I was able to start eating right, just by staying at 1200 calories…yes, we all know we should eat more, but being a “NOOB” I went with it.
I was able to walk/run more (easy when unemployed), and was happy when I saw weekly weigh in results. I even gave myself small challenges: run a mile faster than the week before, or drop x amount of pounds by a certain date. It dawned on me that something good was happening when I weighed in and weighed less than when I had graduated college (I did sports and partied on weekends…I figured those would cancel each other out).
My Weight Loss Stalled
It was 8 short months later that I got closer to my goal weight when I hit a brick wall. SMASH!!!! Like a ton of well bricks…it was a brick wall.
I tried more exercising, eating less, yes I know that was not the way to go, but I had to try something! It dawned on me that I should raise my daily calorie intake! 1200 was good to start, but my body needed more. As the fat left my muscles were crying for more!
At this point, I was starting to work on my self-esteem. I had been in an off again on again relationship for 2 years with a guy who turned out to be a total tool. Even after we broke up he’d still text me wanting to “chat” or send pics…why he still had my number was beyond me, as I had deleted his info the day we split.
I tried the online dating scene. You find a ton of douchebags there. More like I found seven! Yes, 7. I went out on 7 first dates with 7 different guys. 4 had no cars or jobs, 1 just wanted in my pants, and the other 2 were perfect gentleman, at least I thought…they were never heard from again. Now that was a huge blow to my self-esteem, but I didn’t let that stop me. I kept working on myself mentally and physically ; when I younger I looked to food when upset; yep you got it right, I was an emotional eater, but I learned I didn’t need food to get me through tough times. I put the seven idiots behind me and continued on.
Now, I guess you could call me a cardio bunny. For that first 8 months to a year that is all I did. I would take my niece out in her jogger and take the trails for an hour, or swim laps during the summer when it was too hot to run. The weight loss still stalled.
I realized I needed weights!!!!! I missed my college days of hitting the weight room after a great track practice! I loved out lifting most of the guys, and I just loved the sheer power I had. I signed up for a few college classes, weight training being one of them. I was in that weight room 3-4 days a week and gained much confidence as well as made a few friendships.
There were girls who were afraid to lift, but once they say me lifting it was like they gained a new degree of confidence. In that 3 month semester I gained weight (muscle and fat)…I felt a bit defeated but new I needed to tweak the eating again, making sure I got more protein in on the days I was lifting. Muscle Milk is now a friend of mine.
I am still about 25 pounds from my goal weight and once I hit it I will evaluate and see if I want to lose anymore. This “journey” I not a fan of that word, but it works for this entry, isn’t over. In fact it may never be truly over. I will continue to soul search, lift heavy weights up and down, work on myself and be as happy as I can…
Stay tuned, there is much more to come from me.